Read this week’s text.
Sometimes our head and our soul disagree. In our scripture passage this week, our psalmist observes and speaks of the greatness of the Lord and calls out for God to be present, but his/her soul does not heed the words. The psalmist remains cast down, longing, and crying out.
We may call out. We may sing praise. We may read the words of Scripture.
And still our souls are cast down. We are disquieted. We are depressed.
The reality of our world is that loneliness and depression are rampant among us; we are not the first humans to feel a thirst for the living God.
The past few weeks for me have been filled with distress and sadness. The hormones of being a postpartum, nursing mother have only had a negative effect on my countenance. But when I read our psalm this week and spoke with Blaire about her song choice for our sermon series, one thing stood out to me:
I am not alone in my disquiet.
Scripture calls out to me with words that are not encouraging, per se, but they are comforting. They give me a voice to call my own.
I read the words I cannot form in my own logic-deprived brain. I hear a voice speaking this truth:
You are not alone in your disquiet.
There is one section of this psalm that is repeated, and I’ve learned to pay close attention to any instance of repetition in Scripture:
“Why are you cast down, O my soul,
and why are you disquieted within me?
Hope in God; for I shall again praise him, my help and my God.”
Perhaps this section is repeated because one recitation of these words does not affect any change in our turbulent, distraught inner being.
I am sad, and then I get angry that I am sad; I scream at my soul “why are you disquieted?!”
It is in a much smaller, wavering whisper that I speak truth to my soul: “Hope in God.”
To read these words more than once and whisper them to my soul again is almost unbearable, but I know there is truth here. No one has opened any bright windows, but perhaps something stirs in the darkness.
“Hope in God; for I shall again praise him, my help and my God.”
So I ask you today, where are you? Where do you experience disquiet? Where do you experience peace? Praise the Lord if you have peace.
Here’s the challenge in the Word today: Praise the Lord, even if you do not have peace. Our psalmist does. I’m trying to do so.
The waters rise all around us in our vast ocean of dark currents and swirling disquiet. But we call upon the name of the Lord, and our head speaks that which our soul does not always understand.
And I will call upon Your name
And keep my eyes above the waves
when oceans rise my soul will rest in Your embrace
for I am Yours and You are mine
Whose voice do you hear in your disquiet? Who speaks into your thoughts? Whose truth do you acknowledge?
For there is One who has named you, bled for you, and called you His own.
We cry out in disbelief:
I am Yours and You are mine.